Saturday, March 13, 2010

Who am I really?

It’s a funny thing when your ideas of yourself are smashed. I’ve always thought of myself as the responsible stable one, almost boring in my normalcy. I’ve never had a hard time getting or keeping a job. I’ve had full time employment since I was sixteen. I bought a house at twenty five all by myself and kept it even through tough times. So it isn’t an unreasonable thing to believe.

The other day as I was getting ready to go have lunch with my little nephews I realized something. It came to me after I finished curling my purple hair and hopped in my truck. My nephews hadn’t yet seen my new hair color. I thought about what their reaction would be and I realized my nephews will probably remember me as the crazy aunt who always showed up with pink or purple hair or did weird things like shave her head.

It made me wonder just where I actually fit in between these two ideas. Responsible yet boring or colorful but flaky? After thinking hard about both options I can say that neither extreme is desirable.

I say, why can’t I be both? Fun and responsible? Isn’t that what makes life interesting? Striking a balance between extremes? I am the type of person who usually does things to an extreme before I realize too much is not good. It’s when I can scale back and find that balance rather than going all or nothing that things tend to work the best. Though, don’t ask me how to accomplish this because I’m still trying to find the right mix myself.

Every day is a new chance to either screw it up or get it right. Hopefully I have less fail miserably days than the get it right days.


  1. I think the real question of import is whether we live with integrity, and live authentically. Be who you are, and everything else falls into place. Whether that's colorful or dull or offbeat or conventional, it doesn't matter. You're you, and as long as you're being authentic, being genuine, you can't really go wrong. :)

  2. You crack me up, Monica! "Each day is a to screw it up..." :)

    Balance is the key to so many things in life! Nothing wrong with being a purple-headed responsible adult!

  3. Thanks Guys! Love the comments Jemi! :) I like being a purple haired responsible adult. Sometimes I forget my hair is purple and I can't figure out why someone is staring at me, then I catch my reflection in something and have to laugh.



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